Loving Yourself Day Seven

I don't really believe in coincidences. I think everything happens for a reason, and for some reason this week of loving myself came during an incredibly hard time for me.

It has been a battle to try to be kinder to myself, to love myself, to forgive myself.

I've faced/I'm facing challenges that are beyond my control, and those who know me well know that when things are out of my control, that alone is a challenge for me to accept.

My wise roommate, Jen, reminded me of a story that I shared with her after women's conference. I went to Austin to visit my friend Janessa and while I was there I was able to attend an LDS Women's Conference with Sister Julie B. Beck. At the time Sister Beck was the General Relief Society President for the LDS church.

Sister Beck shared a lesson she learned about trials, and the Lord coming during our hour of need.

She discussed a story found in Matthew 14/Mark 6. After Jesus had fed the five thousand he told his disciples to get into the ship to go to the other side, while he went up to the mountain to pray. Jesus remained alone, but the ship was caught in a storm.

Mark 6:46-51"And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray. And when even was come, the ship was in the midst of the sea, and he alone on the land. And he saw them toiling in rowing; for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea, and would have passed by them. But when they saw him walking upon the sea, they supposed it had been a spirit, and cried out: For they all saw him, and were troubled. And immediately he talked with them, and saith unto them, Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid. And he went up unto them into the ship; and the wind ceased: and they were sore amazed in themselves beyond measure and wondered.

The Romans divided the night into four watches, the fourth watch takes place between 3 - 6 a.m. The fourth watch is the last watch of the night.

Here are my notes from what Sister Beck said:
- We have a fourth watch God.The Lord will come to us, when we can no longer make it through the night alone.
- The Savior is watching us toiling, we are not alone.
- He will come, sometimes not until the fourth watch, but He will come.
- That time spent toiling will cause our spiritual muscles to grow.

Now, I'm not saying I'm in the fourth watch, I daresay that this could be worse, I could toil more. But just for today, I can't really do it anymore. I can't handle the toiling, my muscles are a bit exhausted. So instead of the miraculous rescue during the fourth watch, this morning I simply prayed for the strength to make it through today.

Loving Yourself Day Six

Last night I sat down and made some SMART goals.

I think setting goals, and working to accomplish them, is incredibly important.





I also had a very real, kinda hard to hear the truth conversation with a good friend of mine. I got some much needed perspective. Thank goodness for true friends, a voice of reason and some sound advice!

Another note on loving yourself, my incredibly talented friend and former colleague Jenny wrote this.

Loving Yourself Weekends Days Three-Five

One post to cover the weekend and Monday.

Apologizing.

I find myself apologizing a lot, and for things that I don't really need to apologize for. For instance, I sometimes apologize for only ordering Diet Coke when I'm out with my friend who drink. Like my Diet Coke is offending the server.

Sometimes I apologize for the way I explain things, or for sharing my opinion.

I don't need to apologize for expressing my opinion. I caught myself doing this over the weekend.

I'm all for realizing you need to apologize when it's appropriate. But there is no need to apologize for being who you are.

Side note: I've got a massive headache today. So since I'm loving myself right now, I'm going to take some time off and try to get rid of this.

And for your viewing pleasure Beyonce... she goes hard and I love to watch her perform.

Loving Yourself Day Two

Be Kind.

This is what I've been thinking about today. I stayed up late last night, but I was having a great time. Normally I'd be a little bit mad at myself. Consequently I woke up 30 minutes later than I intended, usually I'd be mad at myself.

Today I was a bit more forgiving.

I hear myself talking to my friends about the way they speak about their bodies or personalities. I feel so sad when I hear how hard they are on themselves, and how they choose to say incredibly damaging things about themselves. They would never say those things to me. They are forgiving of my weaknesses and shortcomings, and shouldn't we be just as kind and forgiving of ourselves.

Hi. My name is Jillian and I'm a bit of a perfectionist. Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters anyone????

I assure you I can be a lot easier on myself. I don't think there's anything wrong with high expectations, but I need to recognize my own limitations.

Loving Yourself Day One

I have some pretty amazing visiting teachers who left me with a very interesting challenge. They challenged me to spend an entire week loving myself. Where my biggest focus is on loving me. I think that we so often spend time trying to think of others and being unkind to ourselves, that we forget the importance of loving yourself.

I wrote myself a little not on my mirror... and that was about it. But I'm trying again. So I'm going to blog about my results of the week of loving myself.

So first things first, Megan told me to write a list of the things that I love about myself. I tried to do it last week and I found that it was really hard. I once listened to a lesson given by an LDS therapist and she pointed out that our brains are incredible. When we tell our brain to think of all the things that are wrong with us, it can keep going and going with lists of what is wrong with us. But we can also ask it to think of all the things we love about ourselves. So, that is what I asked of my brain.

So in completely honesty of my week of loving myself, Day one:

Ability to love
Physical strength
Emotional Strength
My waist
Loyalty
Eyes
Style/clothes
Kindness
Friends
Family
Education
Testimony 
Faith
Ability to remind people of who they are
Desire to serve
Stubbornness (yep... I'm weird)
Voice of reason
Dancing like a crazy person
Who I am becoming
Ability to Forgive
Desire to continue even when I fall short
Divinity
Pixie cut
Cheek bones
My imperfection
Recognition of my faults
Love of Sports
Athleticism
Baking
Astronomy
Passion
Desire to consumer knowledge
Knowing/sharing random facts
Desire to be better
My measuring stick (occasionally I lose track of the measuring stick I like to use, that of the Lord's, and I get all sorts of confused and start using other people's but I love it when I am using the right one).

Now that you've listened to me dote on myself, what are some things that you love about yourself?